Change: where life just gets jacked up

change1

“Most of us look at change as a threat.  And why not?  It’s foreign and jacks up what we know and like.  It makes the consistent inconsistent.  It typically removes comfort.”  Jen Hatmaker, from the book Interrupted.

The quote above not only describes where I am at right now with my life but I think where many people are at in their journey of getting healthier.  For today…I’ll just tell you a little bit about where I am right now with my life…cause change is all I know right now… and a few thoughts that I have had these past few months.

yellowstone 2013My Life.

I have now been home a few weeks after traveling over 3,000 miles with my three kids, my mom and two of my youngest siblings.  We had quite the adventure and spent a night in a car, about 6 nights in hotels and 1 night in a hotel but had lost power, including water.  The trip was gorgeous and had its ups and downs, like most (especially those traveling with kids) but it was good to explore part of the world that is out there and see some new things, including BEARS!

I started reading this book called “Interrupted” while we were in this dinky town in Wyoming.  (Dinky isn’t the best word I guess since this town had a hotel and a population in the thousands…some towns we went through had a sign indicating a population of 10.  I’m not joking.)  I was sitting on the hotel bed, enjoying a few minutes where my kiddos were asleep and contemplating if I was ready to even begin reading this book.  See, I knew that this book was supposed to be read by me.  I just wasn’t sure if I was actually ready for this book.  I decided it was time…so I dove right in.

That quote…the one at the top…hit me like a ton of bricks as I read the first few pages of “Interrupted”.  This. Is. Me.  My consistent schedule that I had each day with the kiddos will soon be radically changed.  In fact, it is already changing.

My job situation is in limbo at the moment and we are wrapping up about 6 years of me being a licensed day care provider.  Our day care families are finishing up their final weeks and we have sold about 1/3 of what we have in our house that we used for this business.  Let’s just say…that is a lot of toys, books, paper, coloring books…you name it…that we have accumulated for this job.  We have a lot of opportunities ahead for what I will be doing next in this part of my journey in life but most importantly, I will be working with my kiddos and just being a mom to them.  I’ve had to share my mom duties and time with them the last few years and quite frankly, my kids need me and want me to be with just them.  There is some mom guilt for the things that I haven’t been able to do with my kids the past several years and I am very excited to just be with them…in school activities and outside of school.  Now is the time for that.

Emotionally and physically…our family is ready for this change.

I know that deep inside there is this little unsettled feeling that there is something more and better for me than what I was doing…and it is awesome and a tad on the scary side .  Quitting my job left me with peace…and although no conventional job awaits me I know that this is what I am supposed to be doing right now with my life.  Some of this involves The Journey and what is coming next, but the rest…no real plan at this point.

It might seem odd to some to hear these words but…I know that I was supposed to stop working my previous job.  The book I opened up is helping me realize that I really can’t sit still and watch this world go by.  Here is how I know…

A few months ago I did a project with a group of girls that I am part of called American Heritage Girls.  I am in charge of all the service activities for our group, which means I find ways for us to help others.  I ENJOY this so much…I can’t begin to explain how excited I get to be part of this group and have this responsibility.  What do I do?  I try to find ways to not only help the girls make an impact that will help others in our town and around the world but also for the girls and their families to be impacted right along with the projects.  Cool, huh?!  One idea that we had this past year was to make bags for the homeless that live in our area…and as the girls go out over this next year they are to keep these bags in their cars so they always have something to give to those asking.  I really, really wanted to get the full impact of this and have my husband stand outside by our church and get a bit on the scruffy side and look “homeless”.  I knew it would ruffle some feathers.  I knew that people would not even make eye contact with the strange looking man on the corner.  I knew that when he would have walked in that room during the presentation that not only the girls would realize that this is a REAL person who is needing help but that those parents that are in the room would also fully understand the reason for this project.  (I’m not arguing with anyone about why we shouldn’t help the homeless, about the use of government aid, or what happens to the items and money that are given to those who are standing on the corners asking for help…so don’t start on here.)  That is what I wanted to do…but didn’t…because I knew I would get told “no” if I had asked permission to do this with the girls.

…back to the book…I was reading a chapter and my heart sortof jumped out of my chest and I had to put the book down…because what I was reading was EXACTLY what I was thinking of doing just a few months ago.  It was almost word for word, groupies.  My thoughts were on the pages right in front of me.

change is not a process for the impatientChange is not a process for the impatient” – one of my favorite quotes lately – just reminds me that something is out there for me to do.  I know it.  I just have to be patient and be ready for what that is…cause when I know my heart is going to sortof jump right out of my chest again and I will need to be ready.  I am being patient…but I think that I am already on the path to wherever my journey is taking me cause my heart is beating a little faster…or that is the coffee talking ;0

I won’t be sitting on the couch twiddling my fingers…don’t worry!  I do have a few things to keep me busy and I finally can talk about what those are!  Here it goes…are ya ready?

  • teaching more classes!  I really enjoy teaching and getting to know the people that attend my classes.  Eventually I will have more classes to teach and I am excited for the opportunity to work with the variety of people that I see each week.  Watching people learn, get stronger AND more confident…and become great friends with others in the classes…truly is something to see.  I also get to see people roll their eyes at me as I say “turkish get-up” or “tabata”…but that is ok…I make sure to let them know that I saw it.  😉
  • working at Narrow Road Coffee.  This is a business that my husband and friend co-own…and it is delish.  🙂  I will actually have my first “training” session on packing coffee tonight.  I am pretty excited to be part of this company and use some of my creative skills to help get it off the ground.  I am very good at drinking the coffee.  I got that part down!  You can find out more about this company by checking out their website at www.narrowroadcoffee.org or on their Facebook page too at www.facebook.com/narrowroadcoffee
  • Rumor has it that there may be a mini-gym opening up in my house.  😉  At the moment I have a really empty room that needs some work but soon it will be painted and looking awesome.  Some fitness equipment will be moved in AND you can come workout WITH ME!  I know how it feels to go into a gym when you don’t know what to do…and I want to help woman learn how to use weights and feel confident in this area of fitness.
That's just me, Jessica, and the author of the book "Interrupted".  Some might say...we are secret BFF"s.

That’s just me, Jessica, and the author of the book “Interrupted”. Some might say…we are secret BFF”s.

So, that’s my life in a nutshell…where things are at with me…what I am up to.  I have about a gazillion projects to work on and I know that this is going to be a year of big change for not only me but my family.

My consistent life that I had about a month ago is no longer here…and I am ready to jack things up a bit.  🙂

Next week we will have a blog post about change and how this relates to your journey to get healthier.  Find that RSS button, sign up to follow us via e-mail or get on over to our Facebook page and hit “like”…you will be one of the first to know about the next blog post!

Jessica

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2 thoughts on “Change: where life just gets jacked up

  1. Amy Brase

    Amazing, Jessica! I’m totally in your corner. Let the Lord be your strength if and when those doubts creep in. I love your radical obedience AND your idea for a home gym. That might just be my type of gym. 🙂

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  2. Karen

    So excited to see you going forth boldly, and somewhat blindly, knowing there is a plan for you. You have helped me so much. THANK YOU for your encouragement, including the eye rolling!

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